marriage

To the Best Guy

It's Father's Day, another made-up Hallmark holiday that actually has turned into a worthy occasion. After all, without a card company to tell us that we need to celebrate the special someones in our lives, would we ever get around to telling them how much they mean to us? Maybe we would, maybe not. But I'm going to use this excuse to share with you about not a father figure in my life, but my husband, the father of my children.

In case I've never really said it, JB's kind of great. He is patient, sweet, funny, generous, intelligent, and ambitious. He has adored his children from the first moment he held them in his arms as infants. He also imparted his Faith to our children, raising them to seek God and follow His ways. JB preaches tough love to his kids but then worries about them incessantly. He loves to laugh with them, and to make them crack up. He looks forward to golf outings with his sons more than any other humans. He enjoys sharing what he knows about life, travel and business with his family, teaching them as much as he is able. All of these things make him a really great Dad.

But there is one thing that JB especially does well that makes him an all-star father:  He loves his kids' mom. In our house, we believe that the Marriage is the foundation on which the family is built. So we have always tried to put our relationship as the top priority. Not to say that the children are excluded from the inner circle, but that they are outer rings that form the family with parents that love each other at the core. So on Father's Day, I am so grateful to this man that has adored, protected and loved me like I never knew was possible. His commitment to "Us" is steadfast and true, and there would be no family without his dedication to all of us. Life is not perfect. But I am blessed beyond measure to be walking this imperfect life with the man that is The One for me.

On the lighter side...when our children were young, my husband was highly skilled at playing what came to be known as the "daddy game." It's a very simple game--someone starts to tell a story about their day and invariably, Dad repeats a part of the story back to the teller, but mispronounces one of the names as though he misheard. The storyteller corrects his mistake and he acknowledges but then continues to repeat the incorrect usage until finally, the child wises up and realizes that Dad is doing it on PURPOSE. It is a father's right to tease and torment his children, don't you agree? BTW, JB answers to many names in our circle: there's Dad, Pops, and Daddy; also JB, Loverboy, Butterman, Master of the Universe, Captain Obvious and lastly, Johnny B, when he speaks of himself in 3rd person, usually after performing a signature dive into the pool. 

Hope you all have a wonderful Father's Day filled with laughter and good food. Be sure to hug your daddy or your children's daddy or someone who likes to be called daddy. Hugging is always a good thing.

Here comes the bride...isn't she adorable?

Here she is in all her 1st grade glory…missing front teeth, cute little knobbly knees and oh, so eager to please her teacher. So sweet, she charmed every teacher’s classroom that she graced. She charmed us all, even as she bended us to her will, as daughters are known to do! But what a sweet time it’s been, raising this cutie into a beautiful, intelligent, young woman who gives herself tirelessly to the Pediatric ICU at a Round Rock Children’s hospital. It has been rewarding and challenging and in 13 days she will create her own family unit with her heart’s destiny. They will begin their own family traditions and navigate their new life as a young couple in love.
1st day of First grade

It’s a bittersweet time for her father and me. We are ready for another man to be responsible for her (this follows our empty-nester theme!) but I am also a little sad. I can’t believe that 25 years has passed and brought us to this point when she will walk down the aisle, away from our family and into a new one. Of course I know that she is not “leaving” us but that we are adding a son to our fold, but really, they will be their own entity. There are so many things that I wish for them and so many tidbits of advice/wisdom I’d like to share, acquired over 27 years of marriage; some of these things they will have to learn on their own. But here are a couple of nuggets that I like to share with every couple on the cusp of their marriage.

  1. You have to CHOOSE to be in love. Every day. It is a choice, it does not just happen.
  2. The most important job you will ever have is to be a husband or wife. So treat it like it’s important. Don’t take for granted that your spouse will always be there. If you value your employment enough to be on your best behavior, you should treat your marriage the same way.
  3. The marriage is the foundation of your family. Even after children arrive, you should always treat the relationship with your spouse as the most important relationship. A happy family will follow. Children learn their place in the order and they are happiest when Mom and Dad put their marriage first.

So here’s to Jake & Kate – please join me in wishing them all of the success and happiness that being with your soulmate can bring!

See the Menu of the Week tab to see what I’m cooking this week and then I’m off for two!